Opening day at the old basement workout room, peanuts, popcorn and crackerjacks for everyone. Not exactly…. It was opening day for P90X3, 90 days of fun with Tony and the kids while dieting and working out to get the jello off of the old six pack. So I fired up the DVD player popped in Total Synergistics and got to work.
Here is a brief rundown of the 30 minute workout.
Warmup: Roughly 3 and half minutes.
- Run in place – Total Time 20 seconds
- Jumping Jacks – total Time 40 seconds
- Kickouts – Total Time: 30 seconds
- Golfer grip Arm Circles Total Time: 40 Seconds
- Chicken Wings Total Time: 25 seconds
- Double Knee Pulls – Total Time: 20 seconds
- Double Ankle Pulls – Total Time: 20 seconds
- Double Quad Stretch – Total Time: 20 seconds
Nothing exciting here, but Tony takes the time during warmups to introduce us to the “Kids” and guess who is Number 1? Yep Dreya Weber, all decked out in pink and looking “just gorgeous” as Tony slobbers all over her while crossing his legs to suppress his boner. Next is Jamie, test group guy and the most like a normal human being. Most people will look similar to him doing the routine. Last but not least is a new hottie Alice, or “Pain in the Alice” as Tony refers to her. Much better looking than the Original P90X’s Pam the Blam.
On with the show…
Push-Up/Side Arm Balance – Nothing new here, one minute of work and a nice start to the festivities.
Crescent Chair – Arrrgh fricking Yoga!!! Move from Crescent pose to Chair pose. One minute of hell
Pull Knee Pull – Simply a pull-up while bringing knees to the chest/bar. I managed to do 5 (not bad for first time)
Flip Flop Crunch – This is an Insanity move if I remember. Balance on side, bring arm and leg up, crunch them together.
Crawly Plyo Pushups – Hard to explain this one, I think most people call them spiderman pushups. Tony goes off into his own little world during this section and says something like “If the thought of these don’t get you all wet and moist, you are in the wrong place and you likely have the pulse of an unused English smoking jacket stored in a wealthy magistrates wardrobe! What the Fuck?
Revele Plie – Get on your tip toes and do squats, calfs and thighs burn. Move on.
Chin-up Circle Crunch – A chin up with a circle crunch thrown in for fun. I managed 5 of these too.
Boat Plow – I had visions of a snowplow with an outboard motor on it. Not exactly. Tony says… “I say boat you do boat, I say plow, you do plow.”
Balance Arch Press – Simply an arch press while balancing on one foot.
3 Hop Press – Hop 3 times to the side with a weight cradled in your arms, then press it up.
Glamour Hammer – Is this an excercise or the Title of the porno film that the German chick from the original P90X starred in? I was able to glamour hammer myself right into needing a cigarette.
Brannon Boat – Again this is something taken from Insanity and given an new name. Boat combined with leg lifts/crunches.
Flying Warrior – more god damned yoga…
Squat Rockers – Heavy weight combined with a squat on the toes and rock back to the heals.
Side Rise Punch – Another Insanity move, add a lighter weight and it is a killer.
Warrior Squat Moon – I was hoping this would mean that I would get to moon Tony, I had my shorts half way down before I figured out it was just another damn YOGA move. Thank god it was the last thing, as I stumbled about like a one legged man in an ass kicking contest.
That was it. 30 minutes. I had a nice sweat worked up. Basically P90X3 is just like P90X, but without the long boring breaks in between moves that gave Tony time to open his yap about everything. I used to use the remote control to skip to the next move in P90X and would get done with the 59 minute workout in about 35 minutes. So P90X3 seems to be a little bit faster paced, and obviously has cut out all the damn fluff that I hated about the original. The thing that made me stop doing workouts during P90X2 was just how long it took, when I knew I could get done sooner.
Day 1 – Diet: 1219 Net Calories (I use MyFitness Pal)
Nutrition Breakdown: 40% Protein, 35% Fat, 25% Carbs.
I gave myself credit for 250 burned in Total Syn. (Battery is dead in my Polar F4) 1469 calories eaten, net calories in 1219.
7,803 steps (I was stuck at my damn desk all day)
32 Active Minutes (P90X3 time)
2593 Calories Burned
All in all, it was a good start to the program. I still need pics and measurements. Only 89 days to go!!!