Day 23 – Accelerator

It is recovery week and that means a few new workouts. Today it was Accelerator.  Tony has a couple new workout buddies with him, along with Tracy who we have met before.  (She’s the woman who has popped a half dozen trophys out of the old glory hole)  The new guys are Scott and Kevin.  Scott kind of looks like Scott Hamilton the figure skater, I was expecting him to pull off a few triple axels and some fabulous spins. And then there is Kevin, lets just say that he would look just like Obamas son. (If he were wearing a hoodie, and had been capped by some crazed mexican dude)  Enough about the kids, on with the workout.

Here are the moves, each done for about a minute.

Warmup: Speed Salutation: Basically more shitting yoga, up, then down, up doggie, down doggie and repeat.

  • Twist and Pivot:  Just like the warmup move in other routines, except you can do it with sloppy arms.
  • Foot Pursuit:  High Knees run in place, of course Kevin is going all out on this one, cause he is used to the cops chasing him.
  • Get Up/Get Down: Basically just a Burpee for out of shape lard asses like me.
  • X Jacks and Punch Jacks:  Jumping jacks with arms extened fully so the body is like an X, Or Jumping Jacks with arms punching upward. I remember these from Insanity DVD’s.
  • Balance Burpees: Frog Squat first, then place hands on floor and jump back into plank. Do a push-up and move into Side-Arm balance, then rotate back to plank and do a push-up, then do a Side-Arm Balance on the other side. Put your hand back on the floor and jump back up to squat position.
  • Slalom Hops: Two footed hops over a pair of towels.
  • Mountain Climbers: In plank, run your knees towards your chest one at a time.
  • Spin Tops: Basically another name for squat jumps in Insanity.
  • Plank Walkers:  I was hoping Johnny Depp would pop out and poke Tony in the ass with his sword and make him jump off the side of the building.  No such luck. 
  • Joel Jumps:  See Agility X for what this is.  
  • Plank Circles: In plank, crawl clockwise, then counterclockwise.
  • Roadrunner: Slow and hunched over Mary Katherine jumps is what these are.  Real burners once you get to top speed.
  • Double Trouble Climbers: In plank, pull one knee at a time towards the opposite triceps. Lower to forearm plank on cue and pull knee up and out to the side to the same triceps.  These completely suck ass.
  • Diamond Hops: Place a small marker on the floor and begin and to hop clockwise or counterclockwise, changing on cue.
  • Swimmer’s Planks: In plank, alternate lifting your arm and opposite leg.  Do some sweet stroking in between.
  • Speed Skater: Nothing new here.
  • Plank/Sphinx Combo: Like Tony says, you won’t find this on any Chinese restaurant menu.
  • 3 Squat Hops: Starting in squat position hop three times in one direction, then switch. Alternate between three shuffles in each direction and three high jumps on cue.
  • Donkey Kicks:  I was hoping that it was going to be similar to the degenerate Donkey Punch.  I had visions of Tony kicking Traci in the back of the head as he pulled out, knocking her out in the process.  No such luck, get down on all fours and kick your legs up like a mule.  These are very hard on the lower back, knees and toes.

So I turned 48 today.  Yippee.

Diet: 1,384 Gross Calories,    Net of 906

Nutrition Breakdown: 36% Protein, 48% Fat, 16% Carbs.

Steps: 9,832

Active Minutes: 49

Calories Burned: 2844

Weekly Weight-In: 182.0  Down a total of 4 pounds from Day 2.

So I am 3 weeks into the program and 4 pounds down.  Just like previous versions of workouts, the first 3 or 4 weeks were slow but sure weight loss.  I am hoping that by the middle of the second recovery week that the weight will be about 175, and that by the end of the 90 days I should be below 170.  We shall see.


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